Who am I?

Yeah...this is going to be philosophical.....hopefully not deep enough for boots....

We all try to establish who we are. My blog title is "A 40 Something Teacher". My husband has been poking me because in a few short months that title will have to change....and it is not the "teacher" part that is changing.

On my Twitter account, there is a picture of me and Einstein. I am a lover of all things Einstein mostly because, like many of my students, "school" was not necessarily his thing...

I describe myself as a Weather Channel junkie. I love watching how nature acts.

My Twitter posts are pictures of the cat, the bird, my garden or my yard.(Oh and food...doesn't everyone post pictures of food?)

I have started a second Twitter feed that I hope to use to engage parents . It is following ACT (, SAT, FAFSA, Common Application, Naviance (our school district is starting to use this) the US Department of Education, Edutopia, a teacher from my district who posts classroom information, and our career technical school.

My email avatar is a jpeg that says "Failure is never an Option" and I believe that wholeheartedly.

Selecting a quote for my email signature is like a ritual. I always want it to say something about my character or beliefs. Some examples include:

• "When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get them but you won't come up with a handful of mud either" Leo Burnett

• "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit." Aristotle

• "Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." Ralph Waldo Emerson

• "I didn't get here by dreaming or thinking about it. I got here by doing it."  Estée Lauder, co-founder of Estée Lauder Companies

I have been told I am a digital immigrant working with digital natives.

I have been told I am a great teacher.

I have been told I am a mean teacher.

I think the best was last year when a student said, "Why do the students hate you so much? It's not like you are the worst teacher." I was flattered.

I am authoritative, meaning I believe in a well-defined structure where there are no unknowns. I tell my students, I am a fascist in my classroom...What's good for me is good for everyone.

I take Saturdays off of school. I try to do some house chores, though in my brain, my house is never clean enough. I also try to always do something fun with my husband to make up for the rest of the week. But on Sunday, I try to dedicate a part of my day (usually during the Browns game) to school work. (I love the Browns so it is a good diversion.)

It took me a while to figure out that I wanted to be a teacher so I call myself the queen of "change your major". It worried my parents, because they thought I was going to be a professional college student. (I kind of still am but don't tell them that. They are just happy that I paid for it myself)

I am in the 1st quarter of my 22nd year of teaching. I have seen the changing of the guard with central office administrators in all positions. I have seen principals and assistant principals come and go. I have seen the Ohio Proficiency tests, the Ohio Graduation tests, the PARCC tests (last year) and the AIR tests.

So who am I?

I believe I am a person who tries every day to help students see their potential. Sometimes this comes by being brutally honest. Sometimes this comes by being a cheerleader. Sometimes this comes by having very adult conversations with people who are riding that line between adult and adolescent. I believe it is important to like what you do and do what you like. I am lucky that what I like to do also pays money and if a student can find that thing, they too can be lucky.

(I feel like saying "I am teacher hear me roar", but that would be so 70's and you might not be old enough to understand the reference. Here is a link to the song lyrics I am Woman ,  If you take the word woman and replace it with teacher, you'll get the gist.)

Again...who am I?  I think we re-define ourselves constantly.  Today, I am a  40-something teacher. In a few months, I will be a  50-something teacher and there will be another decade of growth that will be defined by my roar.

My Twitter Ego....

Friday was my first day back to school.  Needless to say, the Twitterverse is all a buzz with back to school stuff.  Some of it for the classroom.  Some of it teachers lamenting the end of summer. Some of it anxiety about the return to school.  A buzz I tell ya...A buzz!  (sounds like my husband speaking)

People talk about Twitter being a good professional development (PD) tool.  So here is what Twitter has given me:

• I follow a number of  educators on Twitter; people from all levels of education and administration.  I love to see a superintendent crazy about his/her schools and students or a principal or coach celebrating academic and  athletic victories
• Over the summer I have read tons of blogs and articles that I have gotten through my  Twitter feeds. 
• I like to listen to podcasts so I have picked up a few more educational podcasts to listen to on my drive home from work.  
• I have learned a lot through Twitter about Google Classroom (I am signed up to participate in a PD session in our district on Monday) and bought a book called "50 Things You can do with Google Classroom" (by @alicekeeler and @MillerLibbi)
• I am learning to "Teach Like a Pirate" - another book I bought by @burgessdave.  I am just a few chapters in....I like it....
• I have gotten the late breaking news on education and the world in general.
• It seems that there is not a lot of love for homework at the elementary levels.
• The marching band and football team at the high school where I teach are geared up for the new school year.
• The superintendent of the school district I graduated from writes a blog.  
• Some guy in Kentucky has given me advice about  what to do with my peppers from the garden.

I am sure there is more but this is just what comes to mind as I write this,  besides the every-man stuff like baseball scores, weather updates, pictures of food, silly animals and people, etc.  I know I have posted my fair share of  silly animals (the cat and bird  we live with) and the flowers, vegetables, and interesting visitors to my yard.  If I find something that I think might be valuable in the classroom, I email it to myself and sometimes forward it on to other educators in my district.

One thing that I have  learned about myself is that I have a Twitter Ego.  I confessed in this blog post Houston We have a Problem that I am addicted to Twitter but it has gotten worse.  I replied to a Tweet earlier this week and I have been watching the  "favorited" and "retweeted" counts go up.  It makes me feel empowered to do something to change the issue that 28 people have favorited and 8 people have retweeted.

It all started on 8/12 @ 6:21 pm with someone tweeting out that they wished teachers had recess.  My reply @ 6:40 pm was that I wished high school students had recess to help with their focus in the afternoon.  I got a reply from someone wishing their kids had just 20 more minutes of lunch. it is now 5:12 pm on   8/16 and the most recent "action" on this Tweet  happened this afternoon.

Now I have said it...the bigger question is: What can I do about it?

That is the thing I find kind of interesting about this "social media" stuff.  Lots of words....what about the actions?  I know I and at least 28 other people believe it but what can we do about it?

From Where I Sit

 

Yeah, I have not blogged in a while.  Every Sunday, my husband sits down to blog and asks me: "Are you going to blog today?" and I respond, "I've got nothing to say".

Today, I have something to say.  My husband and I ride a motorcycle.  In reality, he drives and I "ride" on the back. (I learned long ago that "clutching" with my hand and "shifting" with my foot was  not part of my  wiring.)  We gear up to be as safe as possible.  We never ride without our  armored jackets, helmets, jeans, boots, glasses, and gloves.  We always make sure we are in the best state of mind for riding and that the weather is optimum for our trips.  We have ridden south to  Columbus, west to Toledo (several times) and east to Geneva on the Lake.  We are kind of centrally located south of Cleveland so that gives you a general zone of where we ride.

I sit on the back of a 2009 Honda Shadow.
It is our  second 2 wheel vehicle (the first was a Kymco Grand Vista 250 cc Scooter).  From where I sit, which is higher than most vehicles, I am astounded by the number of people who continue to text while they drive.  Just last night we were riding out of our neighborhood and I am watching this red pick up truck kind of drifting  toward our lane.  As we approached a red traffic light, I turned to look at him and he looked back at me lifting his head from his phone in his hand on his right thigh.  ( yeah...I really have a good vantage point)

Maybe it's my Catholic upbringing or my school teacher-ness that makes me  believe that people should follow the rules (laws). I just don't understand why people continue to  let this" in your hand technology" rule every minute of the day. Sometimes I have this little fantasy in my head that I could be like Starsky and Hutch( the original, not the remake); I can slap that magnetic police light on the top of my "undercover" vehicle and conduct a traffic stop when people are breaking the law.  

I saw an excerpt of this PSA on television yesterday afternoon, before our ride.  It's kind of long but worth the watch.

Life doesn't roll in reverse.  We are not the great multi-taskers we believe ourselves to be.  It is not just your well-being/life you are  affecting.  It is everyone around you. 

IT CAN WAIT.  

I think I might be a revolutionary

Over spring break, I got to go back to my Alma Mater with my godson and his mother.  His mother and I both attended the same college and we both loved our time there.  My godson is in 9th grade and is interested in  a program they have there so this was not our typical visit to our old stomping grounds.  We met with an adviser from the program.  It was a great visit.  She had the perfect words for a 9th grader who is not taking his education serious enough.

So, since spring break, I have been thinking about the things she advised him to do.  As any good adviser would encourage, she  told him he needed to have the best grades possible.  She also told him that he needed to start looking at  taking college courses while still in high school.  (I think this was more parental advice as she has grown children who were still paying off college debt.)  She told him that if he got accepted into the program, she would highly encourage him to participate in an internship.  She introduced us to a student  who had recently participated in an internship with a major player in the field. The experience he described was AMAZING.  Day one, he was asked to "take the Christmas tree down in the lounge" and he ended the experience working on a major national project for this company.  I found this fascinating.

This whole internship thing really seems to be the way to go.  If we want our students to be college and career ready, why do we wait so long to groom their talents and interests? There is no better experience than the experience.  I read a Twitter post today "You never want to get on a plane where the pilot learned to fly from worksheets." Yeah.  Absolutely.

A few weeks ago, we were out for lunch with some friends.  One of our friends always asks me "What do you think about this Common Core stuff?"  Like many people, he believes that the government has gone too far in its reach.  At some point in this conversation, we started talking about college.  Somewhere in there, my mouth started to run.  I stated that I felt that the future was not necessarily to get a degree from a college but to take classes and to also make those connections of internships in the fields of interest.  We demand so much of a 14, 15, 16, 17 year old to "know" what it is they want to do.  And when they don't, how do we help them?

When I look back at  where I started and where I am now?

In 8th grade, I had a teacher tell me I was a good writer and I should focus on that field.  It took me all the way until my 2nd year of college to discover that Journalism was not my field.  I DID NOT LIKE IT.

I tell students:

• I am the queen of change your major.   
• I :
• started out as a journalism major  (HATED IT)
• earned a bachelor of general studies
• worked in property management (GOT FIRED)
• worked in the restaurant management business
• went back to school to be a social studies teacher(really connected with a teacher who worked with students with learning disabilities)
• worked as a substitute teacher and waitress (job ads were looking for varsity coaches who could teach.....something, anything) 
• went back to school to become a "special education  teacher" (what we were called before we were Intervention Specialists)

• I am lucky to have a job that I enjoy.  You will be lucky too if you can find something you are good at that pays money.  If not, find something that pays you money so that you can do the things you are good at when you are not working. 

Myself and my first cousins are the first generation of our family to go to college.  When we went, we did not know what we were doing.  My parents did not know what college was going to be like because they had not experienced it.  I was always a good student but I did not know what I wanted to be or do.  If I had been given some experiences in the world, maybe I would have  figured things out earlier.  I have always been jealous of the person who has always known their destiny.  For those of us who haven't, we need experiences to help us along. Even those who do know would benefit from experience.

Revolutionary or common sense?

The Best People

Right now, the freshman class is reading Harper Lee's "To Kill a Mockingbird". I remember reading this book oh so long ago when I was in 9th grade. Beyond the capturing of a time in American  history, more than the figurative language, there is a great lesson in this story: Stand up for what you think is right regardless of what other people think.  This essence of Atticus Finch is something that the teachers I work with embody everyday as they work with students who struggle with school. This is why I admire each and every one of them for the things they do to help students regardless of what people think.

I'll take Analogies for $500

This whole testing thing has got me thinking. One of the people I follow on Twitter posted a series of analogies about teachers and testing, and likening them to other professions/activities. I kind of like the medical analogy and want to spend this blog examining it (pun intended).

When I go to the doctor, once a year, he asks that I have blood tests completed at least 2 weeks before my appointment. When I  arrive for my appointment, the nurse checks my weight, heart, blood pressure and pulse. I see these all as tests.

When the doctor enters the room, we talk about how I am feeling. He has a check list of symptoms that we review and determine if there is anything we need to address.

We also talk about the results of the blood tests and what they indicate.

In the biggest picture, these are all progress indicators.

The doctor does not lose pay if I have a test result that is not what it should be.
The doctor does not have a bad evaluation by his superior if my cholesterol is high.
The doctor does not have a bad evaluation if my thyroid hormones are not what they should be.
I am not scorned or marked as needing to repeat the tests if my results are not as they should be.
I do not have to repeat the tests until the readings are what they should be. In fact, if my test results are not what they should be, the doctor and I discuss what changes I need to make to have better results. If I do not make these changes, it is not the doctor who is held accountable, it is me. And if I do not/cannot make the changes, the doctor offers alternatives to help me improve my health....interventions.

As a teacher, I have always viewed tests as these "progress"checks.

Are my students learning what they need to be learning?
Am I teaching what they need to know in a way that helps them learn? I have always told students that exams are not just what have they learned, but how well have I taught it to them.

Teaching and learning are that team effort. The moment in the "examination" when the team decides how to proceed.
What is going to help the learner/patient make better choices about their learning/health.
What can the teacher/doctor help the learner/patient with to have a better outcome?
If the teacher/doctor offers help/advice to have a better outcome, and the learner/patient does not partake of the offer/advice can the teacher/doctor be accountable?

Yeah sounds like that teacher cop out moment. But really....school is not like a factory. If it were a factory, the producer would choose the best raw materials to produce the best product (sounds like private schools that are selective of their students). I work in a public school. We don't have the luxury of being selective of who attends. I am a cheerleader and supporter for my students. I continuously encourage my students and treat everyday as a new day despite ....

As I sit here thinking of the "despite litany",  it also sounds like another teacher cop out moment. But really...I cannot control the actions of the people who come to school everyday and the things that happen to them  in the 24 hours between Monday's algebra class and Tuesday's algebra class. I cannot control the absent 3/5 days per week. I cannot control the growth of the brain that says "maybe not now, but later, you will be really good at this subject" or is wired differently and needs different approaches to a subject. I cannot control the chemistry that makes some students depressed, others ADD, and others ADHD. I can, like my doctor, offer help, suggest ways and alternatives to improve the outcomes. I can make interventions but unless the student/patient recognizes the problem and buys into the offers, progress is difficult at best. My doctor may say my cholesterol his high and I have to cut back on cheese. If I don't cut back, it is my problem, not my doctor's.

Houston, We have a Problem

I really didn't start out this way, but I have come to realize: I have a problem.

I am becoming addicted to Twitter....but only on the weekends.

First thing on Saturday and Sunday mornings, I catch up on my Twitter.

If I am house cleaning (a usual Saturday chore) I take a break to catch up on Twitter. 

Yesterday, my husband and I were shopping in the mall. He went to a gadget store. I went and sat down and caught up on my Twitter.

I read Tweets.

I compose Tweets.

I favorite Tweets.

I re-tweet Tweets.

I reply to Tweets.

I read blogs linked in Tweets.

I read articles linked in Tweets.

I follow people. I look at and consider the people who follow me and whether I want to follow them.

I have un-followed people.

People have un-followed me.

I look at the people that people I follow follow (huh?)

As of right now, I follow 185. Some are colleagues. Some are organizations. Some are educators I found through various other Twitter friends.

As of right now, 114 follow me. I don't necessarily follow everyone who follows me.  

The addiction part is heightened by the notifications. I look for those notifications. Someone Re-Tweeted my Tweet. Someone favorited my Tweet.  Someone decided to follow me. It's like reinforcement.  Usually, I am “favorited” or “retweeted” by my husband but once in a while, it happens by someone I perceive to be a Twitter celebrity, a well-known Tweeter. Twitterer? (Not sure what you call them).  In those instances, you feel like you have gotten 140 characters of those 15 minutes of fame.

Now, like any good addict, I never do this at work. Well, maybe just once or twice during lunch. And I am really just a weekend and vacation Tweet-aholic. I can pinpoint just when it started too: A weekend that started on Thursday and ended on Tuesday because of the cold conditions that canceled school. I knew I got the call from the Superintendent telling us there was no school, but I still had to check every possible outlet to make sure it was not some reality dream. And of course, there were Tweets from the school and various extracurricular coaches that school and practices were canceled. One of the cool things was the Tweets of various colleagues, reminding their students of the work/learning that should continue while we waited for the temperatures to rise to tolerable levels for our walking community. 

I would not say that Twitter rules my world or interrupts my life to the point that I need an intervention. I constantly tell my husband that when we retire we are going off the grid, like the Amish.

I can say that sometimes, you just have to watch some random Vine video posted on Twitter about a cat smacking a dog until the dog chases him (@FascinatingVids).

Or follow the fandom of local sports teams (@Browns, @Indians and @Mudhens ).

Or get some good life advice from Life Hacks (@life_cheates  and   @CoolestLifeHack).

Or get inspired by teachers (@hiphughes) and principals (Salome Thomas-EL @Principal_EL and Rock Star Principals @RckStrPrincipal) who are sharing their world.

And sometimes, it is the Tweets of inspiring students (@justinbachman3).

And seeing the coolness of my many colleagues as they tweet their classrooms and things their students are doing (too numerous to list here).

And sometimes you just have to let the world know what's going on in your world (@lisamwiegand).

Testing: The Saga Continues

This post is going to be purely about me.

My husband says he loves summer vacation.  He isn't on summer vacation....he has a "real" job.  He says he "loves" summer vacation because  (and I quote him directly): 

"I get my wife back."

The poor guy, he never knows who he is talking to for  9 months, the Wicked Witch of the West or Glenda the Good Witch.....heck, I never know who he is talking to until my lips start to move.  

I don't think I have slept through  from Sunday night to Monday morning all school year.  I have these  3 AM wake ups that start my brain rolling and  suddenly it is  5:09 and the alarm clock is going off.   I know some people just start their day when that happens.  

If I were still single, I would probably just come home from school and go right to sleep ( my stress coping mechanism).

In the last  2 years, I  have lost 20 pounds.  In the last month, I have gained back 8.  Instead of going home and sleeping, I head to the gym and work out.   It is supposed to help with the stress.  I guess it has prevented me from  gaining more than 8.

I have shooting pain from the right side of my head down my shoulder and there are days I can barely turn/tilt my head.

Friday night was the first time I hung out with friends since November.  (I had to skip my workout to make that happen). It's not that I couldn't make arrangements with friends....but who would want to be around me?

(I just read this post up to this point to my husband. I couldn't help but  start crying...maybe that will also help with some of the stress relief)

Every Sunday is dedicated to school work.  

I told my husband this morning that I will probably have a headache until June.

It's not that I don't like my job.  I love teaching.  I always tell my students I am fortunate because what I love to do pays me money.  I also told them I  would do this for free if my food and housing were covered (I liken it to the old west when teachers received these provisions as part of their compensation).  

I hate testing.  What happened this past week with testing and our students....it was borderline the psychology experiments of the  60's when there were no  ethical guidelines for human subjects. (Wikipedi article on Human subject research).  Can you say CRUEL AND UNUSUAL?

Believe me, I know people want to  know that their children will graduate from high school with skills that will help them be successful in life.  I know that  the greatness of  our country is based on the idea that we are pioneers and innovators.  I understand that the jobs kids in elementary school will work at are not even invented yet.  I do not believe, know or understand how what we will be doing in school from February through the end of the school year will help that happen.  I want my students in my classroom learning and growing.  It is not happening when they are testing.

I can't wait until  summer vacation.  

I can have myself back.

What does anyone really want?

I read numerous  blogs...many of them written by educators.  I follow  numerous people on Twitter....many of them educators.  The other day, I re-tweeted a tweet that said

"Dear America, teachers are the solution to education, not the problem" (@hiphughes). 

 I was excited because several of my colleagues re-tweeted my re-tweet.    

There was another tweet from Edutopia called 6 Characteristics at the heart of teaching and the blog article that was attached: "The Heart of Teaching: What it means to be a Great Teacher" written by Rusul Alrubail.  The article talks about qualities like kindness, compassion, empathy, positivity, being a builder, and being inspirational.  

What does anyone really want from schools?

I once had a student tell me that  grades K-12 are about  reading, writing and arithmetic but school is  really just to teach children how to play nice with others.  It is a time when you learn to communicate.  He felt that the real learning happened as you were older and learned what it was you wanted to be.  

I have had graduates come back and see me and thank me for always just being there; for being supportive no matter how many mistakes they made.

I have had graduates email me and tell me how fabulously they are doing and how much they enjoy college and wish they had someone like me to help them.

I have had graduates come back and tell me how they are still looking for what it is they want to do.

We have recently entered the testing "season".   It gives me ulcers.  It causes me so much stress....I can barely turn my head some days.  I was getting a room of students ready to test the other day. I told them if they heard a thump, it would be me hitting the floor because I  passed out. I was so anxious.  I was nervous and so were they.    We survived.  

No one has ever come back and said, "Thanks! You really prepared me for that test!"

No matter how hard I have been on a student challenging them to  do more....No matter how much I have tried to help my students with their academics, their  life plans, their vision of the future

NO ONE HAS EVER COME BACK TO THANK ME FOR THEIR PERFORMANCE ON  A STANDARDIZED TEST.

The end and the new beginning....

Friday, the quarter ended.  Technically, it ended the Friday before and was followed by  3 days of exams.  It is the end but also a beginning.  Crazy how that happens. It brings to mind that song "Closing Time":

 "every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end" (Semisonic)

I like fresh starts.  Every year, we take the time to look at the last year and make a resolution....a new beginning. 

My husband is a time travel junkie.  This impacts   our movie and TV watching significantly. Enjoying so many time travel stories, makes you stop and think....if there was an opportunity, would you go back and change something?  Would you create a new beginning that would cause a different end?  

Some days feel like  "Groundhog Day" with Bill Murrey waking up to the same day over and over.

Some times you wonder about the "Butterfly Effect" and how making  1 change would impact the rest of your life.

I think most people would  go back and change something traumatic in their lives.  I remember being about 4 years old and walking with  my cousins and uncles from grandma's house to my great aunt's house a block away.  We walked through a field and into a swarm of yellow jackets. All of us were stung  repeatedly.

That being said, I think most of our strong young memories are of trauma and not  of the good stuff and we would be too young in that situation to effect a change if we time traveled.  No one would listen to us.

Maybe it would be a decision we have more control over like what we want to be when we grow up.  Knowing where I am now, maybe I would be able to time travel back and become a teacher during my undergrad work rather than being so undecided and taking  3 extra years to figure it out.  

Maybe I would never have chosen to be  a teacher....can't imagine it but you never know.

I guess most people look back at something they regret and want to change.  I always try to  live with the theme 

Never regret anything you've done 

and 

never do anything you will regret.  

So in the biggest picture, I am always happy because:

 whatever it is, 

it is.

The End is Near

Today is the last day of Winter Break.  Tomorrow is going to be the hardest day to wake up and go back to the real world.

I am the queen of countdowns.

Two weeks of school and then we are into the  midterm exams.

One semester and 3 weeks of school left.

103 days of school left...(90 days in 3rd and 4th quarter, 10 days in the  2nd quarter and  3 days of midterm exams)

I always tell students the school year flies by...and for sure, senior year flies by.

Almost 21 years have flown by.

Happy 2015!

I care....

I think the greatest thing any teacher can give their students is care.  Any way you can express to students that you care about how they do in school helps them care.  I try to use humor most times but  there are times when ...well, I feel like a care more than they do....

I have a starting spiel for my tutoring class that goes something like this:

"Welcome to tutoring, today is Blankday!  All of you have should have something to do.  If you don't know what to do, let's check the grade book and figure out what it is you should be working on. There are  "X" days left in the quarter.  If you have an F, you have "X" days to fix it."  After this, there can be several conversations that follow:

"I really want to you to pass your classes, let's work on fixing the 23% with 20 days left in the quarter."

"I really want you to pass your math class, are you aware you have 10 missing assignments?"

"You have 5 F's; is there really nothing  we can be working on?"

"Can you come and take this test you missed 2 weeks ago?  It is really hurting your grade."

"Is there anything I can do to help you with (insert subject here)?  You have not passed a test yet."

"Can I help you organize the folded papers in your book bag?  It looks like you are carrying around your laundry in there."

"You know, you are missing 2 assignments in Social Studies; With a  58%, just turning in one of those will put you at a passing grade. Turning in both, will really  help you pass."

"Have you talked to your teacher about what is  holding you back?"

I think that is the  hardest skill students need to learn, communication.  Sometimes, I think students treat their teachers like the great and powerful Oz, who lives behind the curtain and everyone is afraid to see the person behind the curtain.  I like to  try to help students get behind the curtain and talk to their teachers. This is such an important skill for people to have, to be able to talk to their  "supervisors".   I sometimes will sit in a meeting and say to a student: "Just  ask your teacher, people really don't know this but we are rational  people."

I also tell them it is a skill that will do them well in college.  I know I did not take advantage of a professor's office hours when I was a college student and I should have.  It may have saved me  the agony of  changing my major and  not knowing what I wanted to be when I was done.  Who knows? I just hope my students can avoid conversations like the one below.
http://youtu.be/57aOIkaXQGc (if your mobile device doesn't see the video)

Education Today

Have you seen this video?

I have seen this video in  a few professional development settings.  They are like our theme or mantra in education these days.  Everything seems to be changing by the minute which makes it feel like  we are flying in a plane while they are building it.  I don't know about you but I would not get on a plane that was being built as it is being flown.  I would not want my children (students) to get on a plane that is being built as  we are flying.  In fact, I am one of the people who says, "Hey, I don't mind the delay if it means they fix that thing on the ground before we take off." I am not  upset by maintenance delays.  I am not upset by weather delays.  I like my plane to be  solid, well constructed and able to get me from A to B without a problem.  I want to fly in a good environment, a safe environment. I think education and school should be the same.  We should not be flying by the seat of our pants as decisions are being made and changed day to day.  The school environment should be about learning and becoming the best person you can be.  

How about his one?

This is another video played in a few  professional development places  lately.  If you listen to the words these cowboys say, it is exactly how I feel about my job:

"Don't let anyone tell you it's easy"

"I'm living the dream"  ( I really do love my job!)

"Not everyone can do what we do"

"I wouldn't do nothing else"

"When you bring a herd into town and ain't lost a one of them aint' feeling like it in the world"

Translation: When you know your students have learned what you taught them, "ain't a feeling like it in the world!"

If I didn't say it before Thanksgiving, I am thankful for my job. I am thankful that I was lucky enough that I have a career that I enjoy.  I am thankful that I work with a great staff and that whether I realize it or not, I affect students everyday.  I'm also thankful when I get on a plane and it is completely built and not in need of repair mid-flight. 

The Random Smile

I am not a natural smiler.  My father often said I bare the weight of the world on my face.  It's heavy. My husband wishes I would smile more often.  I have to practice smiling.  I know it sounds strange but it is who I am.

In college, I  was called by a good friend to  interview for an RA position at an apartment complex near campus.  I was very excited because it meant an opportunity for free rent.  I went through he interview process and  was very hopeful.  I was very lucky to have a friend who was on the inside because the interviewer  spoke to my friend and said, "I really liked her and think she would be good for the position.  But, does she smile?"  Needless to say, I got the job because my friend  explained it away as nerves.  And from then on, I have had to practice smiling.

I find that  smiling is a helpful  tool as I travel the hallways at school.  Not like a big toothy grin. Just a smile that says I see you everyday on my way to class and I acknowledge that you are  part of my existence.  It helps with the  loss of anonymity that  happens in schools.  It is easier to break a rule when  no one knows who you are than when a familiar face  that seems friendly is headed your way.

I have received some random hello's too.  I admire people who are that self assured to randomly greet  strangers.

I think the best story of random hello-ness happened last year.  I was on my way into the building and realized that I did not have my ID badge on.  In fact, I had no idea where it was and I started to have a conversation with myself about it.  There was this young man who I passed daily and we never really acknowledged each other but on that day, he became privy to my conversation with myself as I explained I had no idea where my ID was.    I turned around, went back to my car and found it.  But since then, I have seen him in the hallways and we always smile and greet each other.

A smile is such a small gesture that reaps such huge benefits.  I'm going to keep working on it.

I'm so tired.....

I'm so tired of hearing how horrible the education system is. I'm so tired of hearing about how horrible teachers are. I'm just so tired.

Twenty three years ago, I was the “in thing”. Now, I am an "old teacher". In 1989, (yeah, before the turn of the century) after five years and a change of major, I graduated college and had no clue what I wanted to be. I tried several career paths in the private sector and after two years decided to become a teacher. It was more of an answer to a calling than a decision. I quit my job, returned to grad school, and earned a Masters of Education with a Social Studies Certification. (Some of those Journalism classes I had taken paid off as I practically had a major in History and a minor in Psychology). As a "professional" returning to school to be a teacher, I was a hot commodity. I had "real world experience" and I wanted to be in the classroom.  

During my stint in grad school, I had the experience of working with a teacher who worked with students with learning disabilities. (The "LD teacher"). I loved the idea of thinking differently in order to work with a student who needed something more or different. After starting a second year as a waitressing substitute teacher, I figured it wouldn't hurt anything to work on the certification in order to work with students with Learning Disabilities, as it might increase my marketability. I was a hot commodity, a professional who not only wanted to be a teacher, but wanted to work with students who had difficulty learning. I probably have always been a teacher, but having a job made it more official.

Now, I am "an old teacher".

My entire teaching career has been focused around the world of testing. First, we had "proficiency" tests. Then we had "graduation" tests. Now we are moving to "common core" tests. My entire career has been focused what we are doing to "align" the curriculum to “the test”. How are we teaching the content of “the test"? Do we have text books that match the content of “the test"? Do our tests match the format of “the test”? The newest evolution of "the test" will be on line. And the best part: my effectiveness as a teacher will be graded based on how well my students do on "the test".  

Over the course of my career, I have worked with students who struggle because of the way their brains are wired. I have worked with students who need more time and more practice to learn what their peers are learning. I have worked with students who may have a hard time in the academic realm, but may really shine in a different realm - a "non-tested" realm. My school district has always pushed students with disabilities to do their best. To participate to their fullest ability. And, in the long run, given time, my students have passed all or most of the tests. In the “proficiency” test days, we pushed students to take and re-take and re-take the tests until graduation. In “graduation” test days we have done the same, but held students back from graduating because they did not pass "the test". The "new age" tests will hold students back from graduating and "get rid of" teachers whose students don't make the grade on the test.

Really? Has this become the point of the education system?  

If someone were to ask my philosophy of education I would say: Everyone can learn anything - in time. Everyone has an area that they shine in, and school is the place to work on those areas. In the real world, people specialize. Very few people are experts in all areas. Given time, people can improve their skills and expand their areas of expertise. Sometimes, we just have no interest in an area. I have students who decline to take an art class because they state: "I am not good at art." I made such a comment about my singing to a choir director who was attending a seminar with me and he said: "I can teach anyone to sing." Well, if he can teach anyone to sing, I can teach anyone anything given time.

I became a teacher because I love working with students. I get to work with kids every day. I teach them how to act in the world. I teach them how to seek assistance when they don’t understand; how to communicate with others to get what they need. I teach them that every day is a new day and yesterday was our last best learning experience. If it was a good day, we made progress. If it was a bad day, we pick ourselves up and try to make today better.

Notice I did not say anything about vacations and days off. I don’t know anyone who became a teacher because of the hours we work, the vacations we have, or the days off. I also don’t know anyone who became a teacher because of the tests we give. We became teachers to make the world a better place – one student at a time. I don’t think that is measured on any test.

I'm an old teacher because of the time I have spent in the classroom. I am an old teacher because I have a wealth of experience from the last twenty-one years of teaching. I am not a worthless teacher. I’m tired of being regarded as such. I used to be a hot commodity but now, people just want to get rid of me.

If test results are the mode by which I have become a bad teacher, how do we assess the worth of the people who are creating this system?

The Unknown Impact

I never really know what impact I have had on the students I work with.  It is interesting when a student says "You are my favorite teacher" and I reply: "No way...You hate me?"  I usually perceive that if I am tough on a student who doesn't seem to  have their act together that my constant  harping on them to do what they need to do to be successful makes them hate me.  Maybe hate is  a strong word but it certainly doesn't feel like they like me.  So I am always startled when they say  "No I don't hate you.  You are my favorite."  

I respond "How can that be? I yell at you all of the time to do your work and be focused"  and they say "You are my favorite."

How do you get to be the favorite?

I try to  push students to do more than they  really want to do.

I treat everyday like a clean slate. We cannot do anything about what happened yesterday so let's move on.

I try to trivialize things that seem hard and help them see that they are not so hard.

I try to greet my students at the door daily.

I have a pattern and routine that is known so that nothing I say or do is unexpected.

I try treat them as independent adults and allow them to use their time to complete what it is they need to complete. 

I celebrate  daily victories with  fist bumps and high fives (they have to sting a little or it just isn't worth it)

I celebrate weekly victories with  a pencil, candy and a note sent home recognizing achievement. 

I celebrate quarterly victories with cupcakes and brownies.

I suggest ways to  communicate with their teachers to help them develop those skills through email and conversations.

I call myself "mom" at school as I vigilantly check grades and missing assignments and help them try to do better.

I try to be honest.

Sometimes people ask me: "Are your students good this year?" and I usually respond "They don't have any choice."  I try to help them be good.

I am guessing these are a few of the things that qualify me to be their favorite.  What are you doing to  be a favorite of your students?

Professional Crossroads

This is my 21st year teaching.  Twenty one years is a really long time....at least for a career.  I really enjoy teaching so the time is flying.  I cannot believe  how fast each school year goes by.  I think they seem to go faster every year.  I am always counting down the days left.  People think it is because I am waiting for the end or the next vacation.  It is mostly so that students are aware how little time there is left in a quarter and how much we still need to accomplish.

So.  Twenty one years.  I keep contemplating my next career move and I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up.    I mean really....I joke with  people that I want to be  a stand up comedian and I am  just practicing my material in the classroom.  I'm really not funny though.

I thought about being a guidance counselor...I don't think I would enjoy working as a guidance counselor.

I  completed a principal training program (never  applied for the license).....I don't think I like what principals and assistant principals do?

That principal license could lend itself to administrative positions...I don't really think I  would like any of those jobs either...too far away from students.

I thought about  working on a transition endorsement.  It would be coursework that would  help me be qualified to  work with students in  community based training programs....I kind of like this idea....It would be  helping students  become ready for the world of work.  So I guess this thought is still on the table.

I have contacted  a couple of doctorate programs.  This is mostly because I have this thought way in the back of my head that I might want to teach at the college level.  It intrigues me but I  don't have the confidence that I  can do this kind of work.....not the college level teaching but the  dissertation and all that it involves.  I think to some degree, completing this kind of work would turn my life upside down and I am not sure I want to do that.  It's a big decision because it does not only uproot me but my husband as well.  It's still on the table but....

I do know one thing:  I am really happy being a teacher.  I love working with students.  I love having conversations with them that promote thinking.  I love  being in the classroom. I love teaching!

Every student needs a champion

This year, I am working in an inclusion Algebra class.  I love Algebra.  It is  a language.  It is  a thought pattern.  It has logic and  clarity.  You can go forwards and backwards.  I tell students it stretches your brain.  If you want to be a lawyer, you need Algebra to enhance your logical brain.  I love Algebra but teaching is not about the math.  It is about the students.

I was working on some data for my Algebra team and some paperwork we have to fill out.  We have two Algebra classes together and as the intervention specialist half of the team, I have students who I am dedicated to work with.  I work with all students but there are certain students I have on my radar.  It is my job to help them.  In review of the data, we have 1 class that is 50% Algebra repeaters.  Meaning half the class has  failed Algebra at least once before.

I have 2 students (one in each section) that are taking Algebra for the 4th time.  We have a mantra, me and the two students "We're not going to do Algebra again next year! We are gonna be done with Algebra this year!"  I tell them this as often as possible.  I tell them, that if they stick with me, they will pass.  If they show up and try, they will be done with Algebra.  So far, 6 weeks into the school year, we are making it.  I know 6 out of 36 weeks  does not seem like much.  It is the mostly review  part of the year.  The "honeymoon" period.  I have made a very big deal about  giving them as much positive reinforcement as possible. I am the queen of  fist bumps and  high fives.  I am continually reinforcing all of the  engagement they are showing in class.  I am visiting them in ISS making sure they don't think they are forgotten.  I am sitting with them and working on homework.  I am booking a weekly appointment with them to make sure they  know they can do the work. They need a champion.  They need to  be done with Algebra.

The irony of this situation is that I have worked with both of these students outside of the classroom in the past.  I don't think we ever really got along very well because I have expectations and they did not like the pressure of those expectations.  I think that both of them probably had a nervous breakdown when  they saw my name on their schedule the first day of school.  But I think, I have proven to them I am in their corner.  Even though I had a history with both students,  I do not let that  shade my vision of them.  We are going to get through this.  Every child needs a champion. Every child needs that person who gives them high fives and fist bumps and encouragement, whether they are on their first time through algebra or their 4th time.

Anxiety

The OTES (Ohio Teacher Evaluation System) is giving me anxiety.  This is my 21st year teaching.  I'm not a teacher because I enjoy summer vacation, have weekends off, and have all those vacations and days off.  I am a teacher because at some point in my life, I felt that working with kids was my way to make the world a better place.
I blame the media for my  feeling of "optimism" about making the world a better place.

• Michael Jackson's "Man in the Mirror"
• Robin Williams in Dead Poet's Society as John Keating, the teacher who wanted his students to "Carpe Diem" and walk their own walk. (Oh Captain My Captain Rest in Peace)
• Bob Geldof and Live Aid (the concert across the world that raised money for Africa)
• Lean on Me ( a movie that made me want to be Joe Clark)

I think going to Catholic school  also had that impact on me as we were constantly reminded of the people who had less than we did and how just giving what we had to others would help make the world a better place.

Back to anxiety.  

OTES is the new form of teacher evaluation.  I have seen training about it make principals talk about changing their  careers.  

I'm anxious.

I think I  am a good teacher.  

I hope the state of Ohio feels the same.

Gandhi is  credited with saying "Be the change you wish to see in the world".  

Do they measure that on  standardized tests? 

I chose to be an Intervention Specialist (Special education teacher) because I love working with students who needed a little extra to learn.  

Do they measure that on standardized tests?

I fully believe that the energy you put into the universe is the energy you will get back.  If you put positive energy out there, you will get positive energy back.  Negative energy yields negative and nothing gives you nothing.

I try to put my everything into everything I do.

Do they measure that on standardized tests?

I read, re-tweeted and favorited a twitter post from a guy named Jordan Shapiro the other day: "School is about transmitting values from 1 generation to the next, not organizing labor toward productivity" (Article link) Is that measured on a standardized test?

I sat in church last week and our preacher said that it was important for us to make sure we  instilled a sense of value in the people we see in our day.  It is important to make sure that the child knows they are valued.

Is that measured on a standardized test?

Yeah...I'm having anxiety.

In my own time

My husband says I have to blog before I do any school work because I have not done so.  Here goes.

Yesterday, I  was browsing through my Twitter feeds and there was a post "Retweet if you think the Browns will beat the Ravens and be  2-1."  I retweeted.  Twenty minutes later, my husband, while browsing at his Twitter feeds questioned, "So,  you think the Browns will win?" (yeah! he follows me!)  I responded "Yes" and after some thought,  I stated, "I always believe they will win!"  In fact, as a Cleveland fan, I also always believe the Indians will win.  And if I were a basketball fan, I would believe the Cavs would win. ("King" or no king).  In the big picture, in their own time, they all will win.

The test of winning, is  practice and going the distance. Stretching your  skills and talents to their maximum.  When you are passionate about something, this all comes together and you conquer whatever it is that  you desire to do.  It may not be pretty but it can get better once you are there.  But it has to be something that you really want.

This week I had this talk with one of the Algebra classes I  co-teach.  I think the hardest thing about teaching is to get the students engaged in things that seem irrelevant.  We were talking about homework, which is practice of a skill.  I spoke to the class about Malcolm Gladwell's 10,0000 hours of practice. (Outliers) The idea that anyone who is good at something did not get that way without practice.  They may have had a  penchant for that thing but they put their all in all into it.   The other part of the practice is having someone there to  see it, analyze it, and  help you improve it.  That is the job of a teacher.  The part in the middle, is the part that, in my opinion, the critics of education fail to see.  Our school culture has become so focused on the "test".  Did students pass the test?

I work with a population of students who struggle to pass the test.  They have a disability that impairs their ability to  learn  in the same way that their peers do.  I take pride in the fact that most of these students pass the tests by the time they graduate but it is  "in their own time".  The frenzy of increased testing  that will be starting this year, and the increased graduation requirements take away that "in my own time" for students who struggle.  Does everyone have to be master of everything?

This "master of everything" also  takes away passion.  If there is somehting that I am passionate about that is outside of the  testing world, I probably lose out on that passion in order to be remediated to pass the test. How devalued I would feel.

I know the Indians and Browns will win, in their time.  I know my students will master skills, in their time. Our testing frenzy becomes a devaluing of the human spirit.