The Random Smile

I am not a natural smiler.  My father often said I bare the weight of the world on my face.  It's heavy. My husband wishes I would smile more often.  I have to practice smiling.  I know it sounds strange but it is who I am.

In college, I  was called by a good friend to  interview for an RA position at an apartment complex near campus.  I was very excited because it meant an opportunity for free rent.  I went through he interview process and  was very hopeful.  I was very lucky to have a friend who was on the inside because the interviewer  spoke to my friend and said, "I really liked her and think she would be good for the position.  But, does she smile?"  Needless to say, I got the job because my friend  explained it away as nerves.  And from then on, I have had to practice smiling.

I find that  smiling is a helpful  tool as I travel the hallways at school.  Not like a big toothy grin. Just a smile that says I see you everyday on my way to class and I acknowledge that you are  part of my existence.  It helps with the  loss of anonymity that  happens in schools.  It is easier to break a rule when  no one knows who you are than when a familiar face  that seems friendly is headed your way.

I have received some random hello's too.  I admire people who are that self assured to randomly greet  strangers.

I think the best story of random hello-ness happened last year.  I was on my way into the building and realized that I did not have my ID badge on.  In fact, I had no idea where it was and I started to have a conversation with myself about it.  There was this young man who I passed daily and we never really acknowledged each other but on that day, he became privy to my conversation with myself as I explained I had no idea where my ID was.    I turned around, went back to my car and found it.  But since then, I have seen him in the hallways and we always smile and greet each other.

A smile is such a small gesture that reaps such huge benefits.  I'm going to keep working on it.

I'm so tired.....

I'm so tired of hearing how horrible the education system is. I'm so tired of hearing about how horrible teachers are. I'm just so tired.

Twenty three years ago, I was the “in thing”. Now, I am an "old teacher". In 1989, (yeah, before the turn of the century) after five years and a change of major, I graduated college and had no clue what I wanted to be. I tried several career paths in the private sector and after two years decided to become a teacher. It was more of an answer to a calling than a decision. I quit my job, returned to grad school, and earned a Masters of Education with a Social Studies Certification. (Some of those Journalism classes I had taken paid off as I practically had a major in History and a minor in Psychology). As a "professional" returning to school to be a teacher, I was a hot commodity. I had "real world experience" and I wanted to be in the classroom.  

During my stint in grad school, I had the experience of working with a teacher who worked with students with learning disabilities. (The "LD teacher"). I loved the idea of thinking differently in order to work with a student who needed something more or different. After starting a second year as a waitressing substitute teacher, I figured it wouldn't hurt anything to work on the certification in order to work with students with Learning Disabilities, as it might increase my marketability. I was a hot commodity, a professional who not only wanted to be a teacher, but wanted to work with students who had difficulty learning. I probably have always been a teacher, but having a job made it more official.

Now, I am "an old teacher".

My entire teaching career has been focused around the world of testing. First, we had "proficiency" tests. Then we had "graduation" tests. Now we are moving to "common core" tests. My entire career has been focused what we are doing to "align" the curriculum to “the test”. How are we teaching the content of “the test"? Do we have text books that match the content of “the test"? Do our tests match the format of “the test”? The newest evolution of "the test" will be on line. And the best part: my effectiveness as a teacher will be graded based on how well my students do on "the test".  

Over the course of my career, I have worked with students who struggle because of the way their brains are wired. I have worked with students who need more time and more practice to learn what their peers are learning. I have worked with students who may have a hard time in the academic realm, but may really shine in a different realm - a "non-tested" realm. My school district has always pushed students with disabilities to do their best. To participate to their fullest ability. And, in the long run, given time, my students have passed all or most of the tests. In the “proficiency” test days, we pushed students to take and re-take and re-take the tests until graduation. In “graduation” test days we have done the same, but held students back from graduating because they did not pass "the test". The "new age" tests will hold students back from graduating and "get rid of" teachers whose students don't make the grade on the test.

Really? Has this become the point of the education system?  

If someone were to ask my philosophy of education I would say: Everyone can learn anything - in time. Everyone has an area that they shine in, and school is the place to work on those areas. In the real world, people specialize. Very few people are experts in all areas. Given time, people can improve their skills and expand their areas of expertise. Sometimes, we just have no interest in an area. I have students who decline to take an art class because they state: "I am not good at art." I made such a comment about my singing to a choir director who was attending a seminar with me and he said: "I can teach anyone to sing." Well, if he can teach anyone to sing, I can teach anyone anything given time.

I became a teacher because I love working with students. I get to work with kids every day. I teach them how to act in the world. I teach them how to seek assistance when they don’t understand; how to communicate with others to get what they need. I teach them that every day is a new day and yesterday was our last best learning experience. If it was a good day, we made progress. If it was a bad day, we pick ourselves up and try to make today better.

Notice I did not say anything about vacations and days off. I don’t know anyone who became a teacher because of the hours we work, the vacations we have, or the days off. I also don’t know anyone who became a teacher because of the tests we give. We became teachers to make the world a better place – one student at a time. I don’t think that is measured on any test.

I'm an old teacher because of the time I have spent in the classroom. I am an old teacher because I have a wealth of experience from the last twenty-one years of teaching. I am not a worthless teacher. I’m tired of being regarded as such. I used to be a hot commodity but now, people just want to get rid of me.

If test results are the mode by which I have become a bad teacher, how do we assess the worth of the people who are creating this system?

The Unknown Impact

I never really know what impact I have had on the students I work with.  It is interesting when a student says "You are my favorite teacher" and I reply: "No way...You hate me?"  I usually perceive that if I am tough on a student who doesn't seem to  have their act together that my constant  harping on them to do what they need to do to be successful makes them hate me.  Maybe hate is  a strong word but it certainly doesn't feel like they like me.  So I am always startled when they say  "No I don't hate you.  You are my favorite."  

I respond "How can that be? I yell at you all of the time to do your work and be focused"  and they say "You are my favorite."

How do you get to be the favorite?

I try to  push students to do more than they  really want to do.

I treat everyday like a clean slate. We cannot do anything about what happened yesterday so let's move on.

I try to trivialize things that seem hard and help them see that they are not so hard.

I try to greet my students at the door daily.

I have a pattern and routine that is known so that nothing I say or do is unexpected.

I try treat them as independent adults and allow them to use their time to complete what it is they need to complete. 

I celebrate  daily victories with  fist bumps and high fives (they have to sting a little or it just isn't worth it)

I celebrate weekly victories with  a pencil, candy and a note sent home recognizing achievement. 

I celebrate quarterly victories with cupcakes and brownies.

I suggest ways to  communicate with their teachers to help them develop those skills through email and conversations.

I call myself "mom" at school as I vigilantly check grades and missing assignments and help them try to do better.

I try to be honest.

Sometimes people ask me: "Are your students good this year?" and I usually respond "They don't have any choice."  I try to help them be good.

I am guessing these are a few of the things that qualify me to be their favorite.  What are you doing to  be a favorite of your students?